Garlic

“Master Fletcher, there’s an incoming call from the Harley residence.”

“Oh, finally! Pick it up!” Fletcher leapt up from his bed, tossing his handheld game onto the pillows so he could hover in front of his holo console. A new window popped into the screen, showing a slightly blurry Darwin standing in the kitchen of his home.

“Hi Fletcher!”

“Hey! What’s going on, I thought you were going to come over right after you dropped your stuff off at home?”

“Yeah, sorry, but my mom offered me to give me a ride if I stayed and helped her cook first. I wanted to send you a message, but she said it would be quick...”

“Man, you’d do anything if it meant you didn’t have to ride your bike for thirty measly minutes.”

“Why waste energy on that when Mom has a nice, air-conditioned car that’ll get me there in ten? Besides, she wanted to talk to your parents about something, but that’s not why I’m calling. I’m not sure we’ll be able to make it at all.”

“...Why not?”

“Well, I had to cut up a bunch of ingredients, and I wasn’t even thinking about it at the time, but some of it was garlic. I washed my hands as best as I could, but would you all be okay if I still came over? Is it like a serious allergy, or can you just not be around whole garlic?”

Fletcher stared at Darwin for a long, evaluating moment. “...You’re kidding, right?”

Darwin’s eyeforms fell. “So I can’t come over?”

“Oh my god, you’re not kidding.”

“What?”

“Darwin, vampires aren’t real! We’re just called vampires, it’s the kind of robot we are! Do you think I don’t show up in mirrors or pictures? What’s the matter with you!”

“Wha ‒ I was being considerate!”

Fletcher burst out laughing. “You’re being stupid! Have you thought that we’re actually vampires this whole time?”

“What was I supposed to believe? The first time we ever met, you told me you were an Energy Vampire! You mean you can only drain electricity and sense other robots’ power signals?”

“Yes!” Fletcher was laughing so hard he could hardly speak, “Is ‒ is this why we took the long way around the church when I walked home with you last week?!”

Darwin suddenly became very interested in the bill of his cap. “Mom just walked out to the garage, I think she’s starting the car. I’ll see you soon.”

The call disconnected while the hybrid was still doubled over in laughter.